Golden savings fruit

In Munich Airport, nothing foreshadows nothing that you will now see one of the most strange and amazing cities of Europe – the same sterile and stylish postmodern structure, as in many other places, only very large, very clean and very functional. For example, a high-speed metro station (S-Bahh) is located in close proximity to the global knottack, and after half an hour you get to the very center of the city. The airport is built quite recently on the fact that Munich, thanks to its central position in Europe, will become the most important node, the rival of Frankfurt and Amsterdam. In the meantime, it did not happen, it gives the impression of precisely silence and desert.

Germany I know pretty well, and when we drove into the city, I told my friend, Munich artist Bulgarian-Russian origin: "Not at all like the German city!" In response he heard: "And this is not Germany, it is Bavaria". I then heard this phrase more than once. In fact, in Munich you will not meet the yellow-black and red flag and German eagle, but – twigs in a white-blue barbecue and Bavarian lions in abundance. Even XDS, the party of the Strauss Bavar, here is called "Bavarian KDS". And they speak in Bavaria on adverbs, very much in German.

Munich – some kind of theater stylization under Italy, decorative super-Florence. The city crosses the wasteful direct prospectuses, forced by something like the Renaissance Palazzo of Outlook, with endless arcades and pompous portals. Everywhere similar to the cakes equestrian monuments to Vittelsbacham, Bavarian kings, and triumphal arches, glorifying their acts. The city was very destroyed during the last war, but restored with German (sorry, Bavarian) care. Therefore, you can admire the medieval, and incredibly lush baroque monuments, and the eclectics of the last century, and "Secessia", Which here is not less winding than in Vienna, and that now rarity, – the monsters of the Third Reich Times. By the way, in one of them, weakly, heavy "House of Art", it is where Hitler arranged once "Exhibition of degenerative art", demonstrated "Jewish-Bolshevik abstractionism and expressionism", Now there is an exhibition "Dictatorship beautiful", dedicated to the Soviet architecture of the Stalinist era.

In Munich Chinno, gently, almost relaxed. People do not hurry. Even sparkling "BMW", "Mercedes" and "Jaguara" The last models (and from the old cars more often than the wrecks, you can see the collective antiques) rolls on impeccable asphalt with some Lenza. In two weeks, I, in my opinion, did not see a single beggar, which is incredibly for the big city, noticed that I have noticed hooligans and punks and very few immigrants. However, perhaps the latter do not depart from the conveyors of the auto plants?

Gradually begin to penetrate the life of the city, to grow in his atmosphere. Of course, voltages and passions lie behind the smooth and cute facade, but Munich themselves say that it would be difficult for them to live in Berlin, Cologne or Frankfurt: very turmozhno. And Hamburg for them – almost the North Pole. They talk about their country sometimes that Bavaria is German California. Russians living here, found another comparison: German Ukraine. Name "Namenka" The tendency to self-sufficiency, almost total disinterestedness occurring outside the homeland and perseverance inherent in the residents of Bavaria. The Germans have a joke: "Bavarians are the most stupid of Hannibal soldiers, who, pass through the Alps, did not find the road back". The estimated descendants of the Carthaginian pay a hundredfold, being sure that every northern German can not live in his pleasure and does not know anything other than potatoes and bad beers.

One of my friend, born in Saxony, but who had already lived twenty-five years in Munich and in love with him, does not consider Bavar. He expressed me an interesting hypothesis: this land turned out to be very nutritious for Nazism. , we have everything perfectly, the beer this year is excellent, the cows will be fine, and the snow in the mountains is good! When we gotten, it was too late.

Munich – very green city. And one of the main attractions – "Angleish Garten", "English garden", Huge park, located in the center, along the Izar River. There, among the luxurious trees framed by green meadows, where numerous streams are flowing, Munichs in good days spend their leisure. Mothers carry stroller alleys with their Chads, walking local old men, chinno tapping with sharp tips, rushes cyclists of all ages and social conditions (even a very wealthy Munich does not consider it for himself to change "Mercedes" for the sake of two-wheeled transport). Have a meadow in the center of the park – hundreds of sunbathing, and many, continuing the original German tradition of naturism, is fried on the sun naked. To erotica it, of course, has nothing. It’s just a care for the health and confidence that the natural is impossible to be ashamed. HA MY NEPURITATING PRINTING Naked Bavarian – an unpleasant spectacle.

Hepodalku snaps out "Chinese tower", Pretty nonsense structure in the oriental spirit, and around it – a huge "Birgarten" with long tables, multi-colored light bulbs and pop, on which the brass orchestra performs march-shaped "Viennese" Valsa. About Munich beer establishments, however, later. V "English garden" You can see the few local hippies, punk, clinical alcoholics and, naturally, drug dealers. For a former Soviet person, this park has some nostalgic significance due to the films like "Killings in English Park": Nearby was a residence "Radio freedom", Potted now in Prague.

Munich is a very Catholic city, in any case, if we proceed from the abundance of churches, raising a deafening sober, the number of parishioners, marching on the mass, and stacks of monks and monasters, noticeable everywhere. But this Catholicism is also some Bavarian, walking, lush, full. It does not see any Spanish gloom, nor Italian exaltation.

It is perfectly combined with the beer sea flared by which these edges are glorious. Bavarian beer is famous all over the world, but some varieties can only be tasted in place: they are boiled in small quantities, for their own use. Drink here beer usually from half-liter glasses, but often ordered "mass" – a liter mug that, due to the thick walls, weighs a kilogram of two and a half. How many munchets drinks per day? It is believed that the Golden Middle is a liter per day. I have a feeling that statistics are strongly understated. The main beer event is "Ostoberfest", Celebrated, however, in early November. For Russians, this should not be strange: we did not celebrate the anniversary of the October Revolution in November? In honor of this holiday, huge feces filled with tables and benches are put in the city, the fun begins in the morning, by the middle of the day they are already packed with the public, screaming songs swinging on benches for kissing, falling under the feet of the neighbors, guided need. It is a ritual, a kind of carnival when you can. Usually, of course, more gentle. One of Munich’s main tourist rides – "Hofbrahus", The colossal beer, located in the old vaulted building near the Town Hall and the existing three hundred years. Do not go there – it is impossible, although the clientele consists mainly of the same as you, visitors. Visitors, despite sex and age, devastation, devastating beer from "Mass", swinging, holding burning lighters in the hands, dance and sing under the sounds of the orchestrik, consisting of puzzled versil, dressed in short leather pants on children’s suspenders and hats with feathers. Noise and holt – unimaginable, which is even good, as more than one mug in this atmosphere is difficult to withstand. And the exit is a funny exhibit: metal shelves, to which the numbered cameras are chained "masses", supposedly owned by regulars.

Next to the dusty dead door in the beer, where the Adolf was usually held with his friend. The authorities decided to close it, so that curious and neo-Nazis were not going to be going, but for some reason they did not turn her into anything else.

Munichs themselves prefer the places of Potache, the dispensation, where everyone knows each other. Well and someone else can, at all, not doubting, sit down at the table. HA Him will not throw a slant look. One of these comfortable establishments, also urban attractions – "Schellingtube", Located on Shellingstrasse in Schwabing. It exists from the 80s of the last century, among his regulars were many celebrities, Lenin clapped and, unfortunately, all the same nasty Shiklgrubber. Here they read newspapers, play chess, on billiards, just talk or look at old posters, drawings, photos that are darkened by the darkened wooden walls. Besides, in "Shellingstube" Serve a wonderful and very rare beer "Austinus", One of the oldest in Germany: Monks began to boil him in Munich in the XIV century.

And the unfinished establishments almost every street have many for every taste. Almost everyone owns "Beer" or "winery" Garden in the yard. In clear weather, sit under a canopy, seized with ivy or grapes, sip beer or fright, which in Munich do well, is nice very. With food, however, it is necessary to be careful: the Bavarian cuisine is very hard and consists of huge portions of pork, all kinds of sausages, sauerkraut and incredible salads, which are often the same pork, sausages, cabbage, and sometimes cracker. Satisfying. Fortunately, everywhere – Greek and Italian establishments, inexpensive and with quite correct food.

Perhaps the most pleasant area of ​​Munich is Schwabing adjacent to the English garden. Unlike the historic center, it will not break away from the luxurious shops and the crowd of tourists, and very alive, because the university, the Academy of Arts, Bookstores, Boutiques with Modern Stylish Clothes, Many Gallery and Antique benches are concentrated in it; In the vicinity – many museums. Including Pinakotek with its stunning collection of old masters. Old Pinakotek is now closed for repairs, but the main masterpieces are transferred to the HOB PINACOTEK. It can, so better: there is no need to be distracted by everything that this museum is rich, you can only look at the treasure: on Didear, Krakhan, incredible Altdorffer, Botichelli, Leonardo, Raphael, Rubens, Bruegel, – And how many more wonders hang on These walls!

To visit Munich and not to go to the Alps, to which only ride, is unacceptable. It is there, in small towns, pressed against the slopes of the mountains, you will see not only natural beauty, but also what the Bavaria world famous is known – such an abundance of KICH, that this word is already difficult to use. The abundance and power of this past decoration is so great that at some point you ask the question: and there are not sparkling snow mountains, lakes, reflecting the heavenly azure, dark spruce and bright green meadows, on which thick cows graze, – decoration for fools Tourist postcard?

First Stop – Haleshvanneshloss, one of the insane castles of the insane king Ludwig II. The poor fellow Ludwig spent on his fantasy almost all of the treasury, was recognized as a native inequate and after a few days a strange way drowned during a boat trip. Bavarians, however, they are still proud of. This story is well known for a variety of books and on the film Wisconti. But it is worth everyone to see with your own eyes. From the parking lot you are about ten minutes later through the forest along a fairly cool road, until you reach the foot of the castle, about which Ludwig II spoke to my friend and the ward Richard Wagneru that he was built in "Truly German spirit". In fact, the titanic structure, mounted on the edge of the cliff, is a wild mix of visantism, gothic, some oriental motifs: as if a distraught theatrical decorator built something from residual decorations to completely different performances. There you get up in a multilingual queue (we are lucky, we stayed in it only one and a half hours, and, please, if you deal with your place, then you will not be able to desert you), you can no longer work on the screw staircase, find yourself in a long corridor separated by chain on Two stripes – for German and other tourists. The won the museum, and the guide, and the guide will actually drag on the rest of you. Inside the castle looks even dope than outside. Some nightmare chairs, a monstrous bed with a terrible carved Baldakhin (carving took four years), gilded columns with multi-colored glass, pseudozantine mosaics, a room in the form of a cave with stalactites from Papier-Masha, a giant faience swan. And the walls are completely painted by paintings very dubious quality on the topics of Wagner operas. In conclusion, you go down to one screw staircase, go through the long tunnel cut down in the rock, minute the stalls selling postcards, pennants and jerseys with the image of the castle and its owner, alpine hats, canes, cow bells and alpenshtoks and – thank God! – You have a wonderful view of Lake Alpzee, Forests, Waterfall, Snowy Verses. Perhaps and need to suffer to appreciate the true beauty.

You can still visit Garmisch-Partenkirchen, the high-mountain resort on the border of Austria, adherent to the slope of the Zugspitz mountain and the exorbitant of the Winter Olympics. Mountains are so closely that as if they fell on the town. The town itself consists of three or four streets made by hefty houses in "Alpine" Style. They have tiled roofs, they are risen on the figures of angels, saints, gnomes, shepherds and shepherds, they have a lush carved platbands and everywhere flowers, flowers, flowers. The walls are elected, and on them – the pictures of the moral and historical properties. For example, on the house in which the department is located "Savings Cash", A ruddy stance is depicted against the background of the same alpine house, equipped with an inscription: "Work and save – it will raise gold fruits old age". The Local McDonalds, however, is drawn something strange: Hearters are fighting stakes; Some of them under the white-blue flags in a checkered, others – under yellow-black, in a checkered too. Black and yellow checkered – flag of Munich, but what does this fight mean between Munich and just Bavarians – it remains not known to anyone. Other houses are engaged in very expensive guesthouses and hotels, very expensive restaurants and very expensive shops, trading or clothing from large couturies, or local works: national costumes, rugs with carved butt and hunting knives, porcelain circles, all sorts of mountain canes and endless cherubimchiki , peelings, cows, images of the Most Holy Virgin, shepherds and just Bavarians in short pants. The audience that flaves down the streets – under the age of entoux. Strong Americans in shorts and baseball caps, elderly Texas ladies with podsynyy hair, some old women who are walking in the summer in a long pea coat-log. Hu and, of course, local. Many and in fact in traditional short pants in children’s suspenders connected on the chest, thick woolen stockings and hats with sultans.

I tried to find out whether wearing folk clothing is only in the way of attracting tourists. Most of my informants must and convincingly proved that there is no: it is primarily conviction in your own "Bavskost". True, Japanese women wear kimono, and Scots – Quilt. That’s just us, Russians, what – to walk in the noodles?